You probably Googled on Tantra techniques so you are interested in tantra. However, Google shows you lots of links about tantric sex. If that’s what you want, that’s fine. But know that this article is about a much wider range of tantric techniques. Tantra is much more than tantric sex, so you will find many more techniques. We present tantric techniques both for singles and for couples. First, we will start with a general (more or less theoretical) explanation.
Basic tantric techniques
You can find a lot about tantra on this website. See e.g. the key article tantra explained for extensive information. To summarize tantra: First and for all tantra is about growing in Love and Consciousness (see What is tantra). Second, there are 6 areas of interest in tantra (see Tantra themes).
Slow down – Conscious Living
If you are busy all the time, you are more or less unaware of what is happening in the inner and outer world. Tantra is about slowing down and trying/learning to be more present, to be more aware. There are many techniques to help you to become more conscious. Conscious of what you are doing, thinking, and feeling. And even more important, techniques that make you aware of the fact that you are móre than that, so much more than what you do, think or feel.
Feeling more – Direct use of your senses
Tantra techniques are about creating balance. During our upbringing the balance between body, mind, and soul got lost. The mind has become predominant in our life. Tantra brings back this balance, by emphasizing the body and by the direct use of your senses. Tantra is not about what you think, it’s about what you feel. The basic technique is to very consciously use your senses (e.g. while you work, eat, or have sex ). And to do this directly, without your mind interfering. Just like it was the first time that you saw, heard, tasted, felt or smelt something. Your first sunset for instance. Wasn’t that ecstatic?
Playing with energy
When your awareness grows and when you direct it inward, then immediately your body awareness grows. Inside, there is so much to feel! You can answer more and more and in detail the question “how do I feel” (such as tense, or happy, or sad, or …). Your emotional vocabulary will grow immensely. You can even start talking with your organs and ask the same question (and you will get answers). Certain tantra techniques will help you to discover your energy system (chakra system) and to learn to activate, use and play with your sexual / life energy. You will feel alive again, feeling very energetic and yet totally relaxed.
Tantra is the Path of the Heart. So, many tantric techniques find their base in Heart meditation. ´Growing in Love’ needs you to be in, and connected to, your heart. Letting YOU (out), letting your heart in. Letting Love into your life. Listening to your intuitive voice. Knowing when your “doing” (your actions) is loving (or not). Tantric techniques open up a whole new area, create many possibilities to give and receive.
Pushing your limits
Body, mind, and soul. We are very limited by the belief, that we áre what we think. We are limited by our identification with the mind. Our bodily form also makes us believe that we are limited. Certainly, in a physical way we are, but spiritually we are nót. In spirit -dreams, (sub)consciousness- we are boundless. Tantric techniques help you to go beyond our body and mind. To go beyond judgment and prejudice. Tantric techniques show you the way into the formless world. This world, where duality merges into oneness. Where there is a fusion between the male and female principle. Where the sky isn’t even the limit. Don’t you want to push your limits?
Tantric techniques for singles (beginners tips)
Okay, let’s make the tantric techniques a little sizeable. Use the search engine on top of this website for tantra exercises, you will find plenty of them. In our e-Courses we use techniques based on the following directions/guidelines:
- Take time / Slow down – Do a relax meditation or do NOTHING for 5-10 minutes.
- Start prioritizing: Do you want to be rich and/or happy? Go more for inner motives (well-being joy – happiness).
- Make the world more beautiful, begin with harmonizing your home (clean up the mess) and create a tantric temple and/or a tantric altar.
- Be more aware, start with regular conscious breathing.
- Take responsibility for your own life, your actions, thoughts, and feelings. You are not a victim, you are a magic creator. Stop judging and blaming others for your misery. Take responsibility for your life.
- Feel good, always feel better. Start by knowing how you feel. Then accept how you feel. If you want, go for happiness and change how you feel: Feel better.
- Activate, move and use your sexual/life energy:
- Focus your energy – create – live your passion. Envision, plan, create -step by step- your dream. Do an inquiry or make a vision board. Do the things that fit you, do the things that resonate with you – Cherish this good-vibe.
- Pick up the habit of Heart meditation: Look lovingly – act lovingly – live lovingly. Connect to people by starting to give (love) and enjoy the circle of giving and receiving.
Tantric techniques for couples
If you are not familiar with tantra, then take a look at our tantra basics. After reading this article you can also read the article on couples meditation. We have 2-3 e-Courses specifically designed for couples. However, before you start with these, first take notice of the guidelines for individual tantra practice. Those guidelines will be of tremendous help. I especially want to mention the one on responsibility since it’s oh, so easy, to blame your partner when a meditation (your life) doesn’t work out for you. See: Tantra for Deepening your relationships.
Now we will make some tantra techniques for couples visible.
- Slow down. Also for couples slowing down is important. Just sit together face to face. Sit comfortable and start to synchronize your breathing. Then add eye gazing to this meditation. Just sit still, breathe together and look each other in the (left) eye(s).
- Regularly do an inquiry, or do a sharing. You are together with your partner for a reason, a season and/or for a lifetime. Discovering your lessons-to-be-learned has a lot to do with your partner. So exploring your wounds, your conditionings and blockages is a major issue in tantra. Regularly doing an inquiry is a great way to get to know yourself and your partner. Once in a while, use the sharing technique for major issues, for important areas.
- Awaken your senses. There are a million ways to awaken your senses. The base is that you try to use your senses directly. Don’t let your mind interfere. Use awareness to really see your partner. Use awareness to really taste your food.
- Sharpen your senses, use a blindfold. A great play for partners is to use a blindfold. One partner is blindfolded and the other surprises his/her partner. This could be with sound, smell, taste, body sensations. Use your creativity, use your body…
- Start playing with polarity. Many tantric techniques have to do with the play of male – female energy. Merging together these energies creates oneness. Apart they create the male <–> female attraction (with lesbian/homo couples it’s just the same). Tantra plays with opposite energies big time. Through the chakra system, through a sex-heart-connection. See and try for instance the Swing of Fire.
Tantric techniques for couples
- Do a Heart meditation together. Look lovingly is a wonderful couples meditation. It’s an extension of the eye gazing. See at it as heart gazing. You could start by placing your hand on the heart of your partner. Look lovingly. If you want to actually move your energies between the two of you, do the LoveSwing.
- Learn to love the tantra positions. Being together is key in tantra. In our courses, we also present you many ways to sit or lie – to be – together. Sitting in Shiva – Shakti position, for instance, can work miracles. You can use this position with physical penetration too. The aim, however, is not to explore all the sex/Kamasutra positions, but to focus on those positions that bring you closer together.
- Enjoy transformation. The ultimate goal of tantra is liberation through expansion. Tantra literally means techniques for expansion. Liberating your sexual-, emotional- and life energy. By freeing the frozen, stuck energy of old wounds, your judgmental convictions, and other conditioning. You could start by doing together the Prana Mudra. The Completion is another great meditation to transform sexual energy into the love vibration.
- Melt together into oneness. Have you ever been “gone”? Tantric techniques bring you in a space where time stops. Where you are not important anymore. There’s nothing to fix or to do. It’s a blissful space of well-being and ultimate peace. Couples courses “try” to bring you there. We can’t guaranty it, but if you trust love and surrender, you will merge into oneness.
- Do you really want to experience this yourselves? Then try our:
Tantric sex techniques
Tantric Techniques to last longer
Doing the techniques for couples will affect your lovemaking: it will last longer. For men, sex is as pleasurable after 10 minutes as after an hour. For women, the opposite is true – sex that lasts longer will give them the opportunity to experience more pleasure and multiple orgasms. Unfortunately, most men climax after 4-6 minutes of penetration. In the e-Course, “Tantric sex explained” (for couples) we explain ways to last longer. The same in the e-course “How to become multi-orgasmic” (for men/couples). Many of the suggestions made before apply, but in addition
Take note of this:
- Forget the GOAL. Men (and women) need to adjust their mindsets. The goal of sex is not to climax or release tension. The primary goal is to have a great time together. The be ecstatic together. Funny enough orgasm lasts longer when you forget about it.
- Extend foreplay. So extend foreplay. Foreplay begins the first moment when you think about having sex. Text your partner, let him/her know (that you love him/her). Prepare yourself (see the tantric basics). Do everything you want. Take a shower together, massage, kiss, arouse your partner, everything… BUT do nót penetrate…
- Play with your State of Excitement (SoE). Going for an orgasm first brings you to the point of no return. After that, you’re lost. So we suggest that you play with your state of excitement. Your arousal can go higher, but also can go lower again. If you know how you can play forever…
- Use you SoE -tools. So use the SoE tools to regulate your (partners) arousal. Find out how your breathing influences this. Stop for a moment and breathe slowly. What happens? Find your PC-muscle and train it. Know the power of your intention and focus.
- Make a Heart to Heart connection. Who cares about a peak orgasm when your whole body is trembling with excitement! Who wants to “come” when you are already there. Tantra plays with energy, using polarity, making energy circles, using transformation techniques, the works. Eventually, it all comes down to Heart connection. See the couples meditation for the LoveSwing. Make a circle around your hearts, melted into one, in the Circle of Love.
- For lovers to learn the tantric techniques, get insights, exercises and tantric meditations to practice:
For singles we have a beautiful course to (re)connect with your own sexuality:
Tantric techniques for simultaneous orgasms
Why this topic? Well, because lovers love to climax together. What you have to understand is that (in our teens) we learn to climax on our own. It’s basically an individual experience. So “all” you have to do is to stay together and come together. Don’t wander off. Don’t go on your own trip. Use your awareness, and stay together. Activate sexual energy, and eventually end up in your heart. See also our articles on couples meditation and the e-Course “Tantrix sex explained”.
- Have a great long foreplay – arouse yourself / your partner and take your time.
- Align excitement. Play with your SoE-tools. Stay together – slow down or accelerate.
- Always keep eye contact. Keeping eye contact is key.
- Align excitement. Go to the point of no return together. Give clear signals.
- Make a Heart connection. Look lovingly, pull your orgasm to your heart.
Tantric techniques for multiple orgasms
We have made a special e-Course on this topic. It’s an e-Course for men, but of course also applicable to women and/or couples. It’s a story about climbing mountains. How you can prepare, train, practice. It’s all about relaxing and “controlling” your ejaculation. You can climax without ejaculation! When using SoE tools, you are in control of your arousal. And when using SoE tools, you can last longer and can have multiple orgasms. See our e-Course “How to become multi-orgasmic”.
Tantric techniques: Vigyan Bhairav Tantra
We are very much influenced by Osho and his explanation of the Vigyan Bharav Tantra in the Book of Secrets. We studied this book (Dutch and English) intensively as well as listened to all of his discourses. And of course, we tried them!!! Tantra is not something you just read about. It’s to experience what happens to you when you try out a technique.
Buy the book of Secrets
You can buy the book of Secrets at Amazon:
Listen to the discourses
If you want to listen to Osho’s explanation you can download of the 112 techniques here:
Dutch summary in progress of translation
We are in the process of translating our summaries from Dutch to English.
See the Dutch version on:
See also this overview at: Meditation is Easy:
Osho quotes on tantra
Cosmopolitan – tantric sex positions