How to find a tantric partner
A tantric partner will come your way…
When you show yourself to the world as a radiant, loving person, in full communication with yourself, your body, your feelings, your heart … As someone who has something to gíve. Someone who brings love to the world. In your own life and in that of others… Showing yourself like this makes you super attractive to others. For sure, you will find a tantric partner then, to expand your love, more and more.
Others will see you as a loving, compassionate and intriguing person, and they will love to connect with you. To them, you will be someone that can show them the way to connect to themselves and to you. And you will find yourself in a tantric relationship, in which you can expand your love, more and more. Not only (but maybe also,) physical love, but a real, deep, intimate relationship in which you both can explore the depths of life and love.
… if you become a tantric partner yourself
Many people think that they can only practice tantra if they have a (tantric) partner. Mostly because they think that tantra is about sex especially: about improving your sex life, learning sex techniques, as long as you have an erection and/or delaying or preventing your orgasm. They are looking for a partner from which they can learn tantra and practice it with.
And yes, those are items that are also discussed in tantra. And yes, it’s great to have a partner to be intimate with. But Tantra is so much more than sex. And a tantric relationship is so much more than longer and “better” lovemaking. And the other, that’s not where Tantra begins. Tantra begins with you. How would it be, if you were the one, to teach a tantric partner? Not to be the pupil, but the master? Wouldn’t that be great? To share wisdom and love from your expanded consciousness and loving heart?
So, start becoming a tantric partner yourself. Now!
How do you become a tantric partner, a tantric master even? It starts with you!
Many people are looking for a partner through the internet. Maybe you try dating sites like tinder, or more “spiritual” or “tantric” dating sites to find you a (tantric)partner, or even a soulmate.
In reality, it might not be that simple. To find a partner, or a soulmate it is very important that you know yourself. You will have to know what is important for you because you want a partner who really fits with you, isn’t it?
Physical appearances might be important. Maybe you want to show yourself as (and/or you are looking for) the most beautiful person in the world. But even if you are, still, whats inward counts much more. So you have to discover the true intentions behind your search for a lover.
How well do you know yourself?
So, how well do you know yourself? How familiar are you with your own body, your own sexuality. Many people, both women, and men have no intimate relationship with themselves. How is that with you; dó you know your body? Do you know what you like? Are you free and fully connected with your body, or is it surrounded by feelings of guilt and shame? Do you feel free and do you like your own body? Do you know yourself and are you intimate with yourself, your whole self?
Often this question about being intimate with yourself is understood as: do you masturbate? Of course, that is also a form of (physical) intimacy with yourself. But being intimate with yourself is so much more. To name a few things:
- Do you know your body, do you know how to take care of your body?
- How many ways do you know to enjoy your body? Have you ever tried to caress your own face, maybe minutes long? Did you ever caress your own hand, your arm, touch your own lips?
- Do you dare to touch yourself in every place of your body, also your genitals and breasts, and can you enjoy that touch without being ashamed?
- Are you aware of your desires, do you know what makes you happy? And then I mean not only (but also) your physical desires, but also your heart longings. Do you know what makes you happy?
- Are you familiar with your own emotions? Are you so intimate with yourself that you dare to recognize, allow and feel your excitement, but also your happiness, your anger, your sorrow, your feeling of shame? Do you dare to feel those feelings? Dare to express them?
- Are you at ease, comfortable with yourself, with everything in and around you?
- May you be just as you are. Just the way you are. Are you so intimate with yourself that you know, and feel, that you are perfect, exactly the way you are?
- Do you accept yourself, love yourself?
Intimacy, especially intimacy with yourself is grounded on many (basic) aspects, such as relaxation, presence, inner child issues, health, sexuality, self-esteem, (will) power, love, and emotional healing. These aspects of being intimate with yourself relate to everything: body, mind, heart, and soul.
Why is it important to be intimate with yourself?
Many people seek intimacy with others. Why? Because it’s so nice. And why is it so nice? If you are intimate with someone, you have a sense of security, safety, and love. Of connection. And isn’t that something everyone wants? You cannot be intimate with someone you do not trust, not where you feel insecure. You can have sex with such someone, but that’s just lust, not real intimacy. Yes, you might think, I already knew that, so I need a partner.
Need…. There is the pitfall.
You nééd someone else to be intimate. If you nééd somebody, it’s all just about yóu, about what you get out of it. And the other will feel that, and will not like that. That’s not the kind of energy that helps to connect, no base for intimacy. Then you are a beggar, begging for love or intimacy, and that’s something completely different than inviting and offering, giving.
Intimacy begins with you. If you are ashamed of your own body, your own feelings … when you cannot be tender and loving to yourself … do not know how to enjoy your own body … If you only judge yourself… In short, if you do not love yourself … Why would someone else love you? How can you give someone else what he/she needs? And how can you make another person happy? How can you be free and loving, open and intriguing, accepting and inviting, in short … intimate with another person?
Thát’s what Tantra teaches you.
Intimacy begins with you, Tantra starts with you!
Tantra points to the road. Tantra teaches you to (re)discover yourself. To really connect with yourself, at a deep, inner level. To feel connected with your body. Your body, your emotions, your thoughts, and to accept yourself as you really are. Tantra teaches: you are perfect, someone to love. And more: Tantra teaches that you áre love!!
Tantra also tells how you can convey that love in the world, how you can connect -in love- with others, how you can be intimate with others. It starts with you! First, connect with yourself, then connect with the other. Because then you are not needy anymore. Then, if you are intimate with the other, you have something to give.
Even when you are single, start practicing tantra now!
Don’t make yourself dependent on someone else. Learn to know yourself, on every possible level. Start the discovery of your real self. Because that is real intimacy. Then you are connected to the source, the well of life, of love, of intimacy. Then you can connect with everybody on a very deep, intimate level. With or without sex. But always with love. Love for yourself, love for the other one, love for life itself. Then you are open to connecting to your divine being, the god of the goddess in yourself. How can you be more intimate than that? Your life is perfect, just the way it is meant to be.
We like to show you the way to tantric partnership
First: become a tantric partner to yourself. Discover the secrets of tantra, just by yourself. Develop yourself, expand your wisdom, your insight. How?
10 more tips to attract a tantric partner
- So first: start to know your yourself. Know your (hearts)desires, what is important to you, what you wish from life and from a partner/soulmate.
- Learn to express your wishes in a way, that is not demanding, both in a truthful and loving way. Do you want a “lifetime partner”? Then don’t act like you are just playing around, and be clear about your intentions. Otherwise you might just attract the partner you do nót wish. Even if you’ve just started showing interest in someone, it’s important to be clear about everything. While you needn’t lay all your cards on the table on the first date, don’t hide anything either. Eliminate the potential for confusion and focus on always communicating clearly. This is also very loving to the other one, so (s)he won’t be disappointed afterwards.
- Know your needs, but be also very aware, of what you have to gíve. Be prepared to give (yourself) full-heartedly, and let the other one know that it’s not all about you, but about a mutually satisfying relationship. And of course, act likewise.
- Show yourself as the radiant, beautiful person that you are. And show that you love yourself. The more you get to know and love yourself, the better prepared you will be to give and receive love.
- Life is a journey to understand and accept yourself fully and completely. You have your own faults and strengths and you must learn to love both in order to evolve into the best version of yourself. Without this type of love, you will never be able to truly love anyone else, as you won’t understand how you deserve to be loved.
- Self-love is all about focusing on the positives in life. While you shouldn’t force yourself to be happy all the time, train your mind to think positive thoughts by catching yourself whenever something negative enters your mind.
- Focus on Personal Development: Always be willing to grow. Dedicating yourself to constant improvement is an important act of self-love. While none of us are perfect or will ever become perfect, we can always become better. When you know this, and let your partner (to be) know that you are willing to grow, then your attitude towards a relation is open. The other one will know that there are ways for the two of you to grow in a relationship, and that you are not the only one who is perfect.
- Focusing on all the positive blessings in your life will help you feel fulfilled and complete even prior to finding your soulmate. This will help shape your positive outlook on life, ensuring that you keep attracting more positivity into your life. Moreover, as you practice being grateful for what you already have, make a point to be thankful for what has yet to come. Also in /with a partner.
- With self-love you are able to show that you are worth to be loved and ready to love.
- Well, as said many times now, tantra, intimacy, starts with you. So we developed a tantra course, especially for you. Which, of course, is called: “Intimacy starts with You!”
Are you happy with tantra?
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