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Tantra for women: 10 signs that you, as a woman, are ready for tantra

Many women think that tantra is not for them. Because Tantra is only about sex. And so at most something for men. Tantra is not for them, because for women love and intimacy are much more important than sex. Or because they can only do tantra as a couple. Or because it is unsafe for women because their limits are being crossed.

Here we give 10 reasons why tantra is ideal for women who want to grow and thrive.


Tantra for women – for your own growth and flowering process!


1.     You want more peace in your body and mind.

Stress, tension, anxiety, fatigue. Pressure in your head, pain in your body. Do you notice that regularly with yourself? These tensions lead to blockages of your energy flow. You get tired, unconcentrated, you experience pain in your body, you have no energy to do the things you enjoy, emotional pain arises. Sometimes these symptoms even lead to burnout and cost you years of your life.

Tantra offers you a range of options to relax, to bring relaxation to your body and your life. The free energy flow starts again, you learn to release tensions, stress, physical and emotional pains, and blockages. In Tantra, you are invited not to go anywhere, but to be with what is at the moment, such as your embarrassment, your resistance, your pride, your emotion, your impatience, your strength, etc.

“Everything can be there”, it sounds simple, but often doesn’t feel that way. Tantric exercises and meditations bring you closer to that, help you to be more in the here and now, and to be able to deal with what is not so easy or even difficult in your life at that moment. Becoming aware of what’s going on is the first step, choosing to embrace this in love the next.

And what may be there doesn’t have to go away. Then there is no struggle. And that helps, because the struggle against what is not allowed is often harder than what actually happened, and therefore also causes much more tension. To relax isn’t something you can dó, but tantra offers you many tools to create the space in which relaxation can arise.


Tantra for women – for your own growth and flowering process!


2.     You want to feel lively, enthusiastic and wonderfully energetic.

Tantra takes your vital, sexual energy as a starting point. You do not only have this energy for eroticism, but it is the source of your liveliness and creativity. to experience your life force in different ways.

That energy is in your joy, enthusiasm, sexuality, anger and … vulnerability. If your sexual energy is blocked, and that is often the case through our upbringing and (ecclesiastical) culture, then your life energy won’t flow. Then you are under the spell of shame, guilt, uneasiness with your body or with your (sexual) feelings.

In tantra, you will find meditations and exercises that help you to both feel your body and to be completely in your body. To feel completely woman. Flexible, flowing like water, as a beautiful, sensual and sexual being. Sometimes wonderfully emotional, totally in your feelings. If you are allowed (also by yourself) to be that woman and dare to be who you are, then you feel free. Then your energy flows freely and you feel fully charged and alive. Then you show the world the beautiful woman that you are and you, and without having to do anything, you show what you are capable of.

Enjoy all your energies

And at the same time, we make a distinction between male and female energy. We have both energies in us. But even those energies are sometimes not free, for example, because we start to behave in the way (we think) that we are expected to in a certain situation. Sometimes you “may” not be soft and sensitive, chaotic or emotional. Sometimes you “may” not be tough and firm, decisive and initiative-rich.

Female energy is directed inwards. It invites us to be gentle, slow, sensual, self-caring and receptive. By going into the delay you come into contact with yourself, you sink nicely in your body and your heart opens itself to what is happening in you. In an atmosphere of integrity, respect, playfulness, and safety, you can unfold you’re being a woman, step by step.

Male energy is outward-looking, decisive, powerful, decisive and independent. Sometimes it is important to take action, to do the things that need to be done, and choose the direction that is right for you, and do that decisively.

Tantra teaches you to recognize (and recognize) both energies in yourself. And to be able to use them when it suits you (your situation). To be able to let your female or your male energy flow and to use it freely.


Tantra for women – feel lively, enthusiastic and energetic!


3.     You want to be happy with your body, feel more confident.

How about your self-confidence? Do you always compare yourself with others and do they all have a nicer, tighter, younger body than you? Would you like to feel more womanly, feeling sensual, feeling alive? Do you long to come home to yourself? To feel confident and intimate with yourself and your body?

In tantra, the revival of your body as the ‘temple of your soul’ is central. There is enormous pressure on girls and women to meet the cultural figure standards. Tantra invites you to look at your body and that of other women in new ways and to feel (more) at ease in your body and enjoy it. To feel the connection with your base and your life force again.

When you get more in your body, when you can love your body again, feel it and enjoy it, your self-confidence will increase and there will be more relaxation.

The way is then cleared to allow your own being a woman, intimacy, and sensuality and to experience more consciously. Everything is present in your body. It is important to know the way here! In tantra, you will follow a number of paths to become acquainted with this. You learn not only to accept your body, but also to love and enjoy it! Enjoy it!

You will be happier with your body than before. For example, by no longer comparing yourself with others. Other, beautiful bodies, you can see, and just enjoy, without jealousy, because you are happy with your own body.


Tantra for women – happy with your body and full of confidence


4.     You would like to be better able to guard your limits.

Like most women, are themes such as “self-love” or “boundaries” also very important to you? Precisely because you are not so good at that sometimes? It could be that you want to broaden your limits. Or rather that you want to become aware of what limits you need to feel good about yourself or in a certain situation. A lot seems to have changed due to emancipation, but border demarcation is often still difficult for women.

Being willing to sacrifice, feeling guilty, modesty and adaptation to others (pleasing, desired behavior) are often in the way. In all areas of life, and certainly in the relationship with men.

It is up to you to take your responsibility there: to develop your own sexual identity, to know what you need and what suits you. Guarding boundaries and pushing boundaries are both expressions of love for yourself. To really enjoy it, it is important to be able to trust yourself in setting your limits. To be able to say “yes” in full is equally important as to dare to say “no”. Consciously dealing with your limits brings you closer to yourself and therefore to the other.

In tantra, you learn to become aware of your limits, and you are invited, often in a playful way, to explore dealing with your limits. In tantra, you learn to treat your own boundaries and those of others with respect.

Art. Pushing boundaries, guarding boundaries


Tantra for women – push ánd guard your boundaries


5.     You want more balance between giving and receiving in your life.

Just like dealing with boundaries, this theme also plays a role in “giving and receiving”. Women often think that they are very good at “giving”, better than “receiving”. Tantra teaches you to look at yourself, to investigate why you care so much. Is this really out of love for the other, or do you actually want to achieve something with it, get it over in return? Can you really ‘give’ demand-free?

Tantra helps you to discover what your heart desires are, to listen to the voice of your heart. To discover what is it that you truly desire? And also, what you actually do from your heart? You discover how great it is when you do something from your heart, give from your heart. And that giving from your heart doesn’t “cost” you anything, but that you actually receive a lot yourself.

You also learn to look consciously at your own desires ánd take responsibility for them. So: do you dare to ask? And can you also receive? You will then discover what it’s like to receive demand-free. So not with: I would be grateful IF …, but full of gratitude for everything that is given to you.

In tantra, you first learn to give yourself what you long for so that you start ‘flowing’. And then how you can make this work in your daily life. This way you will act more based on your wishes and desires. And that means that you start living from a more complete ‘yes’!

Give and receive in sex

Many women know very well how to give from their hearts, gladly and easily. But can you also give from your pelvis?

In tantra, you also learn how you can increase and recharge the sexual energy in your pelvis so that your body becomes more sensitive. As a result, you become more aware of your essential, unique, sensual, feminine nature.

Tantra teaches you how to make a heart-sex connection, and how lust and love can come together. So you can not only give from and receive in your heart but in a way that your body, your sexual energy can participate. Giving and receiving from a heart-sex connection provides a lustful, free, intense and sensitive experience of your sexuality. In order to get from ‘sex’ to ‘Lovemaking’. That is a way in which both partners are in tune with the desires and needs for love, intimacy, and sex of both. So it goes much deeper and is also much more satisfying than “normal” sex.

Art. Give and receive demand-free

Art. Do you know your hearts desires

Art. Looking for connection


Tantra for women – for more balance in giving and receiving


6.     You want to live a loving life with yourself and with others.

Living from your heart. Tantra is the art of loving: yourself, life, the other. We often start with the other. We love the other, we are able to do everything for someone else. Because we think that makes us being loved. Because we need the love, appreciation, and respect of the other to know ourselves loved.

Each of us sustains injuries throughout our lives. We all experience things that touch us, that hurt us. And because we don’t like that, we create a defense, a wall, against that (possible) pain. We don’t want to feel it. We lock our heart for the pain, but … with that, also for love.

Tantra is the path of love

The heart forms the core of our being and for women, it is a gateway to connection, intimacy, and sensuality. If your heart is locked, you are not connected with it. When your heart opens, your thoughts (judgments, fears, emotions) fall silent. You feel the love that makes the connection -with yourself and everything around you- possible.

Tantra helps you to heal yourself, to break the wall around your heart, and to feel open and full of love. Like that, you can give love (again), and then there is the openness to receive love (again).

Living with/from an open heart changes your entire life. Living in love is living in connection, instead of in separation. You learn to open yourself (your heart) again, to see and experience the beauty around you, and to be happy and grateful for it. You experience that life is good and beautiful and that you, the people around you, yes, even the whole world is perfect, just as it is.

Living with an Open Heart


Tantra for women – for more love in your life


7.     You want to be a radiant woman.

A radiant woman knows and guards her limits, knows her wishes, has a positive attitude and is grateful for everything she meets in life. As a result, it has a great appearance that attracts people. She knows that she is perfect, just as she is!

But a radiant woman is also sometimes uncertain, just can’t remember anymore, is confused. But she sees that and can just leave it there.

It is so important to honor the loving, flowing and also the silent and healing power of your beauty, sensuality, your body, your heart, and soul. Tantra provides healing through silence, awareness, and connection of your heart with your sensuality. This brings you to the essence of being a woman.

How do you become a radiant woman, attractive to yourself and others? By loving yourself. By not suppressing and denying your sensuality and your sexuality, but by bringing it to full bloom and enjoying it. That gives an unprecedented sense of intimacy with yourself.

Look lovingly

We often do not take the time to do this. When did you last look at yourself lovingly in the mirror? Not 2 seconds, but really for a while? When was the last time you danced wonderfully sensual? Can you touch yourself, not functionally, but caress softly and lovingly. Sensual even! Caressing your own hands, face, arms, abdomen, breasts, pampering, and enjoying it completely, be happy with your body and yourself!

Believing that you are perfect, just the way you are is no arrogance, it’s self-love. You are worth it. Of course, you have some nasty habit patterns, some unloving thoughts, some limiting believes. You don’t have to work very hard to change them: when you consciously and with self-love see those things, you watch it every time it happens with loving consciousness, they will change. You will change. And you still will be the same perfect person you already were.

Tantra awakens your consciousness and your love. But tantra also awakens the sensual woman in you. That is a major part of you that is worth to be seen. Not repressing it, but showing it! It helps you to be and show the radiant woman that you are!


Tantra for women – for the radiant woman that you are.

Intimacy starts with you

e-Course Intimacy starts with YOU !

Living with an Open Heart


8.     You want to (re) discover your fire, your sexuality.

You would love a flowing body, enjoying intimacy and sex.

You want:

  • like to feel more, experience your fervor
  • enjoy your own sexuality
  • enjoy making love with your partner
  • experience more intensity in your body
  • feel sexual energy without creating negative tension
  • learn to release the control
  • develop my own sexual experience
  • achieve a higher sexual level
  • feel with your body. Dare to feel. Dare to follow your body. Unlimited …

Consciously or unconsciously, this is what every woman wants. To surrender to the enjoyment of her sexuality and to dare to do so completely, without being afraid of judgments such as “slut” and “whore”, with which the environment sometimes scatters so easily.

At home in your body

Tantra helps you in all kinds of ways to feel at home in your body and to free yourself from all kinds of (unconscious) blockages. To enjoy your body, your feelings of excitement, horniness, and a delicious climax… Experience unprecedented orgasms that make your body sizzle. To have the most wonderful sex with yourself, alone, but also together with your partner. Tantra gives you the tools for greater, deeper and more intense pleasure… The tools to enhance your love life.

But tantra does even more. Especially for women, the connection between heart and sex is so important. Fiery, passionate horny sex, it’s delicious and can also be done, of course, no judgment on that. But making love with/out of deep intimacy, a deep connection from the heart with your partner … LOVEmaking … Tantric sex shows you the way to deep experiences of passion ánd love, of fire ánd silence, of excitement ánd tranquility, of having no goal to work to ánd wonderful orgasms  Tantric sex takes your love life to unprecedented heights.

Tantra even shows you the way to Bliss. The union with your partner can go so deep, that you will feel completely One. And in this, you can experience the joy of becoming one with the whole universe. Transcending love to ultimate Bliss.


Tantra for women – to fully enjoy the benefits of your sexuality

Rediscover your sexuality

(re)discover your sexuality


9.     You want to come home to yourself, be who you really are.

Tantra is about going inside and coming home to yourself first of all. To become relaxed and so radiant that you naturally attract others. To sink even deeper into your body and grow towards expansion in life energy, love, unity, light, consciousness and deep enjoyment and merging with yourself and with your partner.

Love starts with self-love and that includes a loving, friendly way of dealing with yourself. Examine your self-image and connect with your physicality, sensuality, and sexuality. Self-love is something that we are often insufficiently taught. You are invited to meet yourself lovingly.

One maybe new way for you to do that is to seek silence. To go inside. Not to look for what others think of you, but to feel for yourself. In that silence, for a while just BEING… Discovering what you get to see about yourself. To feel what is important to you, to experience what is in your way.

In that silence, you can go to your heart and feel how much love there is. For yourself, for others. Sometimes hidden behind a wall, but it is there. And in that silence, you can feel the love in your heart and also let it grow (again). (Re) discover yourself in love.

Growing awareness

In addition, Tantra teaches you to become more aware. Awareness helps you look at yourself. For example, to your (old / child) beliefs, which often give you an image of yourself that does not fit at all with who you really are. Someone once said: who is waiting for yóu? And all your life you will believe that nobody really cares about you. Someone told you: you will never be able to do that. And you think that education or a good social position is not reserved for you. Let them go, those old images and feel free to live your own life, follow your own stream, be who you really are!

In Tantra it is all about awareness (awareness), silence, taking the time, relaxing, listening to your heart and opening your heart. And there and then you will come home to yourself. You will be in peace with yourself and the world, grateful for life and your own existence. YIn the silence you will relax and find the peace in your heart, the safe feeling that you are welcome, loved, worthy and uniquely needed in this world. Just because of who you are.


Tantra for women – to discover yourself, who you really are, in silence, love, and consciousness.


10. You are looking for that deep connection with the other.

Very often it is that opposites attract each other. Maybe you too are a woman who loves to be and do very much together, who is deeply connected and is willing to do a lot for that… Then you probably will attract a man, who loves his freedom, who likes to do things on his own, and who is willing to give up a lot for that.

There is an age-old pendulum of being alone and being together. Whoever is in a relationship, sometimes desires to be just wonderfully alone, to decide everything on his own, to do what you want, at your own time, with whom you want. Wonderfully free.

Someone who does not have a “permanent” relationship can sometimes long for someone who is always there for you, who feels you completely, who supports you, helps you when needed, and sometimes takes care of you. Feeling the wonderful (heart) connection and the beauty of a loving person around you.

So we often swing from one side to the other. You establish a connection with a partner, it is difficult for you to always be together and to have to take someone else into account. You break the relationship, enjoy your freedom … until the desire for a partner comes again, and voila, a new relationship. And the game starts again. From one extreme to the other.

Evolving to a tantric relationship

A tantric relationship is different. In a tantric relationship, you are both aware of this pendulum. And you learn to look at the half-full glass and to be with the half-empty glass. You learn to accept situations, but you are also prepared to do things differently. To allow your partner and yourself freedom in addition to an intense connection with each other. Above all: the freedom to be you/yourself, even if that is not that easy for you.

You learn that freedom and connection are not contradictory, that they can go beautifully together. You learn to take care of yourself and the other / the relationship. Your partner is your mirror, and therefore the biggest trigger for your growth process. You learn how to deal with freedom and connectedness, the way your partner does, and how to see it as a growth opportunity for yourself.

You also learn not only to focus on your own needs but to find the love in your heart to give the other person what he/she needs to be the person he/she is. And you also learn to take care of yourself, to guard your limits, to feel free to be who you really are!

Tools for deep connection

Apart from this, are actually nót apart, tantra learns you new ways to get into a deep connection with your partner.  In meditating with your partner, in exercises likes “become a better listener”. In stillness, being silent together. Also in lovemaking, and in doing things together, or in just “being” together. In touch e.g. the tantric touch you make a lovely and very deep connection through the senses of your body. Tantra knows so many ways and will show you how to become deeply connected. With yourself, with others.


Tantra for women – to live in deep connection ánd freedom

Art What is a tantric relationship

Key-article relationships

What is intimacy

Looking for connection


Bonus

11. You would love to meet a partner that suits you completely.

To begin with, I want to explain that you have a lot of tantras, that you can “do” tantra without having a (‘permanent’) partner. It is often thought that tantra is mainly about more intimacy (with a man/men), better sex or better love life. Because these are important areas of life, they certainly have their place in Tantra. But tantra is first and foremost a personal development path, a path to grow in love and consciousness.

Nevertheless, the longing for connection, the longing for a soul mate, a (life) partner, is a very natural longing, which tantra, therefore, does not ignore.

Tantra will teach you that it all starts with you! And that also applies to the road to a partner.

Because this is how it will not work:

  1. You are unable to be happy with yourself, you cannot be intimate with yourself, you do not find yourself worthy to love … Why would someone else do that?
  2. You need someone because you cannot be happy without someone around you. Or you need someone who gives you confidence, appreciation, care. When you are alone you feel pathetic and lonely. to put it briefly: you are a beggar… That certainly does not make you attractive to a partner.
  3. You are looking for a tantric partner in the pub, at a chess club or a club for super intelligent people. Of course, there can also be tantric people there, but you don’t make it easy for yourself by searching in an environment where tantric (relationship) elements do not have the first attention.

Tantra for women – that’s how you find a tantric partner


This is how it will work

  • You show yourself as a loving person, with compassion, intriguingly beautiful.
  • You are self-aware and full of self-confidence.
  • You have to give something instead of needing something (you are a queen instead of a beggar).
  • You can take care of yourself, yet are open for others.
  • You don’t have to look, you will be found because you have a lively, feminine, you have a crushing sensual, sexual, radiant appearance and are therefore very attractive.
  • You live your passion, your hearts desires.
  • You admire men, have faith in men instead of distrust.
  • You meet men with an open body and an open heart.
  • You know and respect your own boundaries.

More about this in the article How to find a tantric partner


12. And finally, because you want a deep connection with your partner.

You can connect with a / your partner in many ways. Tantra offers you so many opportunities to deepen your relationship to an unprecedented level. More intimacy, a wonderful love life … A relationship that brings you into a deep connection with each other, up to the level of unification.

Tantra shows you so many ways to grow in your relationship and to let your relationship grow. To walk a spiritual development path in the intensity of your relationships, by yourself ánd together. A path of the heart, a path of love.


Tantra for women is growing in (a) deep loving relation(s), in love and consciousness.

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Satori de Ruijter

Hi, my name is Satori. You could say that I am enjoying life very much. Always looking at the bright side. My passion and lifestyle is tantra. Tantra is in my life for more than 20 years now. My wife and I fully enjoy it. We gave tantric workshops for many years. Now retired, but we have online tantra websites (ENG/NL). See online-tantra.com or .NL

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